Today was one of the toughest days so far. We have had multiple days of rain and overcast skies with the weather turning very fall like. Well, when I woke up and looked outside at another one of these overcast days, I just want to return to bed. Of course that was not an option as my wife had already left for work and I needed to put the dogs out, feed them breakfast, wake up my son, get him ready for the babysitters, get myself ready and out the door.
I think do to the depression I really enjoy sunshine during the day. I love the sound of rain at night when I am sleeping but during the day I need the sunny skies. I feel like the sun energizes me when it is out and I feed off its natural energy. When it is away for too many days I feel like the overcast days sucks the energy I have out of me.
Today was also one of those days that I have to go to work and I know it is going to be busy but it is a lot of hurry up and wait. I am not a fan of the waiting part. During the busy part of the day, the time just seems to fly by like crazy, during the wait times, it slows to a crawl. This is when I get antsy and need something to do. Most times I cannot move forward in my work until I receive the information I am waiting for and I cannot surf the net to kill time, so my options are limited.
This is when the craving monster comes out. It starts off with, hmm maybe we could grab something quick to eat to kill some time, you have been doing well on your new food plan it wouldn’t hurt to have a “special day”, you know if we were full we would be more content and the time wouldn’t be driving us nuts….etc.
I am proud and happy to say that I stuck to my regular food plan and didn’t give in to the craving monster. It felt like he spent most of the day trying to convince me to go out and get something unhealthy to shove down my gullet. The thing was every time I began to think this way I would listen to my stomach and try to determine if it really needed food. It was content every time. This made me confident that these were just cravings from some past life and not what I was looking for anymore.
Let this be a lesson to everyone out there that if you are trying to lose weight and suffer from depression, you can overcome your cravings. Even on days that you feel down and out without the sun, you are strong enough to stick to your guns.